We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

End Of My Wit

by Orthodox Straight Edge

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

1.
Survive 03:06
Quit playing tricks on yourself. You know all this is real: All this guilt, all this shame, all this pain you feel. I can't begin to relate to what you're going through; Manipulated and jaded you have no room to think. Cling to me. I'll do my best to never let you sink. I know it's hard to climb back up from the bottom But at least now you found your ground to stand. My advice would be fill the lungs that you rive But a deep breath's not an option when you're trying to survive. I know exactly what you've done... But I swear to you now I am not all you have left. I Am Not All That You Have Left! So much potential. I won't let this be your final breath. So Breathe.
2.
I'm Only 01:33
I'm only corresponding with codependence. Waiting for my chance of repentance. Taking note at your every clue, Just trying to get right back to you. Just trying to find my way back to you. Could it be These clues aren't as they seem? And I know just what this means, But I can't do the right thing! So here I crawl to the foot of this bed of nails. Just trying to get right back to you. Just trying to find my way back to you!
3.
Sometimes I sit and think: Does God know how it feels to bleed? And if he does, when I doubt him does he doubt me? When I fail, he's the weight forcing me to my knees. But when I overcome, does he even notice? Do you even notice me?! Am I really missing out if I'm only born once? Maybe I feel it shouldn't take two tries. If I hear, see and speak no evil Then I'm a deafened mute with blinded eyes. The water you walked on is causing me to rust. So how do I bow before a God, that I can't even trust?
4.
Sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. Am I at the end of my wit? Am I slowly becoming uninspired Or is my mind finally starting to slip? Are all of these the true reasons behind my persistent haze Or just the excuse that I place behind my cynical ways? The haze and the ways that make me lose my focus. The haze and the ways that make me feel I’m hopeless. Laughing at myself because I’m a joke. Stuttered breaths: On these words I choke. Breaking for things I could do without. Shooting my foot while it’s still in my mouth. But still I try to run. My walls: they come undone. But still I try to hide A place where you won’t find me. No matter how hard I try I can’t stay clear of sight. My steps are way too loud. My ego shines too bright. Then finally I’m caught. My eyes become distraught. I can almost see the end. Then I break free again! I keep running away.
5.
Fool 02:20
It seems I'm always on the losing end of a one sided argument Where condescension is key and key words are bent. I'm a bigot - I'm pretentious - In the end... Burn me at the stake for the sarcasm I spew. Hang me by my neck because I share a different view. Call me putrid - Call me stubborn - In the end... I am just your fool! (I am just your fool) For walking straight in a crooked wood. (I am just your fool) Because I don't feel how I'm told I should. Now a difference in opinion means I am wrong. So it must be that I am just your fool. I am just your fool!
6.
I've made myself out to be very clear. There is nothing and I mean NOTHING... Worth my time being wasted here. I'm done with trying to find where I went wrong. So in regards to you - This is my final song. I've made myself out to be very clear! There is nothing in your hands bold enough to keep me planted here! This Is Not For You! I'M BREAKING FREE OF THIS! My act of "selfishness." I know my push is gone. But I'll struggle on my own No More.
7.
The Rope 01:53
The knot in my stomach has tied itself in a noose And my repeating thought process tells me it's time to hang loose. So I step and I fall and I flail. A long drop and a sudden stop. My lungs are forced to exhale. Here I float with this rope around my throat! (x3) The binding breaks. I fall to my knees and think: Do I retie the rope?! (x2) I aim to feel the difference between life and death. I look up to the clock to see: Is it time I take my own final breath? I am nothing. I am nothing. I am nothing but dead to you. Do I Retie The Rope?!
8.
How could you? How dare you? Why couldn’t your God spare you? I’m outraged. I’m confused. My heart is wrenched and misused. Tell me who gave fate the right to decide. Tell me what I have to do to bring the light back to your eyes. Just tell me what to do! I’ll hold your wrist while I stab the beast that bit it. Press my lips to your veins; suck the poison out and spit it! And I’ll keep trying though I hate the taste But in the back of my mind I know you’ll allow my efforts to go to waste. With a heart beating out of habit it's a shock that you've made it through all these years. Stuck in a maze through the haze of your ways; You take the wrong turns in stead of turning to face your fears. Still no matter how much spite you swallow You’re still starving for attention. And tonight I’ve come to realize That my two blind eyes simply won’t suffice. I’ve done every thing I can. There is nothing I can do.
9.
You are nothing, you are nothing but dead to me And now it's time I change my scenery. I could turn my head if this time was the first But all I'm doing is losing in these games that you coerce! You are nothing, you are nothing but dead to me And now it's time I change my scenery. It's like you push me just to see if I'll react. You took one step to far and now I'm pushing back. I'm Pushing Back! With all these bystanders to take your blame you hide your bruises well. And though you've watched it burn your own blood You drag yourself through the same hell! Are you proud of yourself? Well I've got to ask... How does it feel? How does it feel to walk with new notches in your belt? How strong is your judgement with the new cards you've been dealt? Do they bring about a heavy hand Or just a conscience that you can't stand? How many mistakes will it take before you break down and reprimand All the lies you've told, all the hurt you've sold All the love that you're bound to fake On the second step too far that you're bound to take! And now I can finally see All of my new scenery! You are nothing, you are nothing but dead to me!
10.
I can't keep running away! Even if it means I suffocate, I'll turn and face the cloud of smoke I've made. I have patience, and I have courage, But both amounts are wearing thin. I know deep down, I deserve this. But why must fear be what molds good men? I think I'm at my wit's end. I know one thing for sure... I made these ghosts that are haunting me Breaking this sense of security! How can I face all that I have done? I guess I better lift these feet and run! Though I know I can't escape. I'll always be outsmarted By the ghosts that I create. Creatures I've come to hate. I can't trust my feet. I admit defeat. This must be it. I'm At The End Of My Wit! Bury me.

about

This album is for anybody who has ever fallen victim to actions stricken from the hands of an addict.

You do not deserve it. You are not to blame.

XXX

All music was written by and performed by Orthodox.
All lyrics were written by Adam Easterling.

credits

released July 9, 2013

Orthodox would like to thank:
The Straight Edge, Bryan Sveum, Chase Wilson, Nashville Hardcore, Danny Gosciniak, Cooper Pemelton, Bobby Patterson, Daisyhead, Empathy Hardcore, Aesop Rock, and of course Root Beer.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Orthodox Straight Edge Nashville, Tennessee

ORTHODOX
- XXX -
NASHVILLE, TN

contact / help

Contact Orthodox Straight Edge

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like Orthodox Straight Edge, you may also like: